I hurt so badly that I am almost beyond feeling now, How cruel is love that this is always the place it leads us and like merry naive children we follow even when we know where it leads. Driving helps, tonight I drove for an hour and I tried to let the rain comming in the window wash my hurt away. I know all the comfort words people will offer, it wont last, time will heal, your so much luckier than some, I know these things and yet I find myself taking no comfort from them, I know Im not alone in my emptiness and that people all around the world are feeling the hurt of love everyday and yet the hurt generates the selfish belief that this pain is somehow different, even when I know its not. It always hurts like it never hurt before, every damn time. As Nanny Ogg would say the wages of sin is death but so is the salary of virtue...sometimes it makes you wonder what the reasoning behind virtue really is, perhaps its a ploy by the sinners to keep all the fun in thier world while the virutous take all the torment that they leave in thier wake. Something to ponder. Not that in any way I align myself with the virtuous..perhaps this is merely justice afterall I feel certain there are those who would see it as such even if I dont.

The day is sunday, it is drizzling in some palces in this city I currently call home and the mood as you may be aware is gloomy.

This is your update I hope you have enjoyed.