Anything but ordinary......

Sometimes things just seem to work out for the best even when you think they never will, and then again sometimes they dont. I have a decided lack of fairy godmothers working my beat, I want to know where they are and who is using up all the wishes! I have a theory on this but I'll save it for another day, todays blog is just a general vent caused by indecision.......I am very bad at making choices, standing up for myself, and especially at walking away from things destined to end badly! I met someone, and they are very nice, gentle and sweet but strong at the same time. They stand out cause I noticed them, usually I meet people and thats great, they seem nice, yeah I'll chat, have fun ect but they dont stand out from everyone else around them, most people are like this and yet sometimes with some people I notice them, usually this means I should definetly run the other way as fast as I can. Some might think why is this such a problem, meeting people is good yes? well yeah it is mostly, but right now I'm in a strange situation that will become even more complicated if I start seeing someone else. I am still in love with my best friend, A close friend confessed thier heart to me only to face rejection, and I am still reeling from the accompaning shit of my break up I really don't think now is a good time to be meeting someone! Plus I already have a lover (someone else I noticed) who I am very fond of despite him being a complete shit sometimes, so I am already seeing someone, its not supposed to be serious and I am certain he is also seeing other people so it should not be a problem but I dont like that, if I'm seeing one person I see only that person, christ I am bad at relationships when they involve just one other person can you imagine the nightmare of dating two people at the same time! Besides I am unsure what it is we have or how I feel about it right now, sometimes I think I should just say goodbye and walk from it but mostly Im enjoying him so I dont. I know there are so many other problems in the world and I really have no right to bitch about the complexities of dating and hardships of my anything but ordinary love life, but knowing that changes nothing these things petty though they are still grate and take time to resolve. I know that this will sort itself out and if I have issues with my current lover then blogging about it will help less than actually talking to him about it, but nevermind that is all a problem for another day, for today just blog my incoherent thoughts, answer my emails, phone the people waiting for me to phone, and cook dinner for some friends. Hope everyone out there has a great night, and if I know you and your reading this my apologies but hey sometimes thats just the way it is......dont like it dont read it.
take care unitl next time!